Here I am - How are you?

Here I am, I am afraid to say I have been doing better because I don't want to jinx myself. I still feel a bit manic (again, no prior history guys!!) and need to walk like 1.5 hours per day to burn off all the excess energy that I have. I am lucky to be able to do that.. I don't think I have a choice. What I worry about is if this excess energy takes a left turn at the end and I end up with akathesia or acute. I posted on BB --how many people have ended up with acute after an accidental cold turkey or fast taper? If I hadn't sensitized my system or had protracted BEFORE this mess I would feel more confident. And yet, there is nothing I can do but trust the process and trust my body and surrender.

I helped someone today whose sister wasn't well.. she thought she had a brain tumor and felt her brain wasn't working right. Nope. Ambien and klonopin. Once it was identified she felt horror and relief.... WHY is this happening everywhere?  How are young people, professionals, innocent people with medical conditions, mothers, fathers, computer programmers, lawyers, writers, people who had full lives being led down this dark road and assured that it's ok. I guess it is ok for many.. but is it? Maybe it isn't as dramatic as the stories on BB but how can this practice be a good thing? After so much data, so many stories of suffering, we have to put an end to the overprescription and misinformation around this issue.
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I have been feeling more grounded. At least for today. 
6 or so months to go if I do this carefully. We will see. Maybe I can do it in less. Then everyone says, don't expect to just be well once you are off.... it takes time for the body and mind to heal. Heal Heal Heal. These words are music to my ears.